Opinion

The English XXX Files

Summary

The Union Jack has always been “a butcher’s apron”

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Remember when the English were under pressure from revelations that they tortured some relative of then US President, that tanned white man, Obama. Obama of course was doing his own torturing at the time in Libya, Syria, etc.

England’s selective revelations were then designed to let off any pent-up outrage, days before the London Olympics in 2012, and to reinvigorate the image of “Brand English!”

Their media claimed they accidentally found out their government had destroyed files at English torture centres operated around the world.

Other skullduggery was of course kept hidden: One analyst noted, they’re “Keeping the more incendiary material…for a future date when the hubbub around the files has died down!”

The English government then promised to release information, presumably suppressed illegally by their own laws, about Sri Lanka. This of course never happened.

They had tortured US President Obama’s paternal relatives in Kenya in the 1950s. A group of carefully whetted Kenyans, “detained and allegedly tortured during the Mau Mau rebellion [had] won the right to sue” the English government. These Kenyans presumably uncovered files “hidden for 50 years in a secret Foreign Office archive!”

The Manchester ‘Free Trade’ Guardian claimed those acts occurred “during the final years of the British empire.” Now when could that be? Did it include today and tomorrow? It supposedly involved people massacred, executed, imprisoned and tortured between 1946-67, some much before that, as “Britain fought a series of rearguard actions across its rapidly diminishing empire.” 

England’s Foreign Office “promised to release 8,800 files from 37 former colonies held at the highly-secure government communications centre at Hanslope Park in Buckinghamshire,” with some of the “200 metres of shelving” disclosed at Surrey’s Kew National Archives. Only 8,800 files? Most were useless revelations: Caroline Elkins of Harvard University noted, England’s “Foreign Office transparency is a carefully-cultivated myth.” The US should know!

We were ‘carefully’ told the English Army’s Intelligence Corps operated a secret torture centre in Aden (now in ravaged Yemen), 1948-51. Half a million Malaysians “were resettled in concentration camps quaintly called New Villages.” Poison gas was to be tested in Botswana.Diego Garcians were secretly forced off their lands to give the US a military base.

But most files were “systematically destroyed to prevent them falling into the hands of post-independence governments.” With clear instructions issued: “Only British subjects of European descent” should purge records!  

Officials in Kenya had to burn files with “the waste…reduced to ash and the ashes broken up,” or dumped “in very deep and current-free water at maximum practicable distance from the coast.” Colonial officials had to preserve doctored “Legacy files” – to be left for the colony after independence. Most files were stamped with a red letter W, as “Watch Files” to be destroyed or removed to England.  “As independence grew closer, large caches of files were removed from colonial ministries to governors’ offices, where “new safes were installed.” When a W-file was removed from Legacy files, a “twin file” – or dummy – was inserted in its place. 

A whole new generation of English officials and their colonial loyalists now know about cutting-edge subterfuge and sham. To cover up brutishness, here are the real lessons to be learned on crafty statecraft.

One history professor noted that the FO offered “no sensitive documents from British Guiana,” where “one democratically-elected government” was overthrown by English troops in 1953, remianed under heavy English surveillance in the late 1950s, with very well-documented and unprecedented joint Anglo-US covert operation, 1962-64, involving “terror bombings, detention of politicians, and black propaganda.” The English government was still hiding lots, and wouldn’t “have destroyed resources for its foreign and security policy, in particular the kind of thick data on local people which the Government House files would have held.”

English media coverage of these haphazard revelations then justified what they do around the world. ‘Comments’ on the Guardian article exposed well-honed English defence mechanisms to justify their mass murder.

To one Irish reader, it’s “no surprise,” and to another: the Union Jack has always been “a butcher’s apron”. Many echoed: “Of course they sought to suppress insurgencies. Why wouldn’t they?” Some lamented: “Another great excuse for self-flagellating about our past. It’s a national sport.”  There were the usual – colonies would’ve been “a bunch of warring tribes” if not for the English. And: “Do the Belgians, Dutch, French, Germans, Portuguese or Spanish, beat themselves up over the evils of their former empires?”

English rule “was often an alternative to despots, tyrants and warlords who were even less illegitimate.” Some comments went tribal: “For all those Scots/Irish/Welsh nationalists saying the empire was a purely English endeavor, please note 70-80% of all MPs, Generals, Commanders and Admirals were, in fact, Welsh, Scottish and even Irish!”

Some followed the Marquis de Sade: if you’re robbed, you should be punished for allowing it! “I don’t condemn it as the Indians were foolish to allow it to happen to them.” Some were more honest: “In fact, I’m rather grateful to the exploits of the British Empire. I, like pretty much everyone else in Britain, enjoy a standard of living built on the back of the Empire and all it achieved, so why shouldn’t I be grateful to what the Empire achieved.” And the final coup de grace: “Sure some of the actions of our predecessors were pretty abhorrent, but I’ll be fucked if I’m going feel guilty about it!”

You gotta hand it to the English. Their three main exports, like any brand, is regularly tweaked to refresh to entrance local Anglomaniacs. The first ‘export’ is their claim to have a free press, which the rest of the world presumably does not have.  The second is their terror machinery: their ministry of war, shedding 99% of its blood in other countries, is now called ‘Defence.’ The third and most important is their banks, which still control our economies, and on whose behalf English outrages and lies continue to flourish.

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